Wednesday, October 03, 2007
THE WOMEN. I'm sure our liberal friends would tell us that fantasies are normal, healthy, and harmless. Let's put it to the test. Yesterday's news produced two different fantasies involving women. Check them out and decide for yourselves which you prefer.
Here's the first one:
[T]he welcome House Speaker Nancy Pelosi got today on ABC's chick TV show "The View" was more than warm - it was downright steamy.
Even before Pelosi walked on stage to take her seat at the round table, the show's moderator, Whoopi Goldberg, and its co-hosts - with former news anchor Barbara Walters leading the pack - started flirting with the speaker's husband, Paul, who was seated in the front row.
"You wanna take a look at Nancy Pelosi's handsome husband?" Walters asked the audience. Yes, came the answer in the form of whooping and hollering.
Poor guy was actually blushing...
Whoopi got the pleasure of introducing Speaker Pelosi, who she noted is the first woman speaker of the House who, somewhere along the way, managed to raise five children.
But Walters was still stuck on Mr. Pelosi, unfortunately for Mr. Pelosi. And this is where a little blushing turned to a Code Red alert, four-alarm fire.
Trying to shout over Whoopi and her other gabbing co-hosts and excited audience members, Barbara turned to Guest Pelosi and said she has heard Whoopi say before that she'd "do Paul Newman."
"And I think she'd like to do your husband as well," Walters deadpanned in that quintessential accent that made her the subject of late-night lampooning over the decades.
Of course, Whoopi being Whoopi, she couldn't let that one go, which is where the speaker begins blushing.
Yes, Whoopi implicitly acknowledged, she'd like to do Mr. Pelosi - but she might take his wife while she's at it. "I would do her as well. But we should wait on that because you're still in office, I don't want to cause a problem."
And here's the second one, courtesy of Ann Coulter:
If we took away women's right to vote, we'd never have to worry about another Democrat president. It's kind of a pipe dream, it's a personal fantasy of mine, but I don't think it's going to happen. And it is a good way of making the point that women are voting so stupidly, at least single women.
It also makes the point, it is kind of embarrassing, the Democratic Party ought to be hanging its head in shame, that it has so much difficulty getting men to vote for it. I mean, you do see it's the party of women and 'We'll pay for health care and tuition and day care -- and here, what else can we give you, soccer moms?'
Did one of these strike you as vile, absolutely not normal, and maybe even downright disgusting? Most people do have this kind of bifurcated reaction. But that doesn't mean they're right. It means they're probably neurotic about sex, one way or the other.
Take advantage of this opportunity to get some professional help.
This has been a public service message from InstaPunk.