Archives
Sunday, June 01, 2008
Obama Decides on a New
Church
XOFF NEWS. After days of in-depth research, the Obama campaign has selected a new church affiliation for the candidate that is expected to boost his popularity in Democrat constituencies where he has been weak.
"We didn't want to depart too strongly from the kind of tradition Senator Obama has been used to -- a vigorous, enthusiastic, pentecostally joyous congregation whose devout beliefs reflect working class concerns and backgrounds," explained campaign spokesman George Axelrod. "At the same time we wanted to take the opportunity to do some outreach and create a new bond between the Senator and typical white people from embarrass--, uh, embattled states like Kentucky and West Virginia."
These criteria led to the choice of a Pentecostal Baptist Church in Jolo, West Virginia. In announcing his decision, the Senator said, "Michelle, the kids, and I are truly looking forward to next Sunday's service, and I feel sure that the majority of hard-working white Americans will soon see that whatever our religious differences may have been before, they are now a thing of the past. Jolo Baptist is probably exactly like the church next door to all of you who don't live in California, New England, or Chicago."
The tornadoes that struck large parts of the nation yesterday are believed to have been caused by a collective sigh of relief from the Democratic National Committee.
Here's a little more about Jolo.
If sanity is the measure, we're sure the Senator will feel right at home. Electorally, we'll just have to wait and see.
