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Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Somebody pinch me.
![]() TROY. When I was very young, I toyed with the notion that slavery was the Original Sin of the United States. That somehow the fact we had tolerated it for however long would bring us down. Then I became a student of history. I learned that we weren't the first or the worst in this category of sin. I came to believe that the terrible price we had paid to undo the crime committed at our founding might constitute a sufficient atonement. There's a lesson for you. Sometimes an ignorant kid knows more than an educated adult. Now that I'm approaching old age I have learned that it can be harder for a good man to forgive a sin in his past than for a bad man to forget an entire life devoted to murder and greed. That's where we are right now. The piper is about to be paid. He has come calling with his bill, dog-eared and yellow and presented by an arrant faker, but it doesn't matter because we remember the debt and have been waiting so long to pay it that we don't even care to ask the collector for his provenance. Obama isn't the messiah. He's the punishment a good man keeps waiting for while everyone else just moves on in placid forgetfulness. Is it justice that the good pay a higher price for their sins than the bad? Maybe. But in dramatic terms it's invariably a tragedy. Because it always entails a catastrophe that could have been avoided and somehow wasn't. If we're living out the plot of a play by Sophocles, there's no point in trying to avoid it. What will come is already decreed by fate and there's no point in dragging an adding machine into the story. But if we're really just play-acting a dimly remembered myth, then it might be instructive to hear the machinery noises of the adding machine as it grinds out the line items of the ancient bill we're so determined to pay. Here are some particulars you might want to take note of on the invoice. This election was always about race and nothing but. Obama was born of the radical sixties, the offspring of an academic Marxist whose preferred form of rebellion was marrying a Marxist Kenyan for the purpose of pissing off her Kansas parents. Her son wasn't an African-American in terms of slave ancestry, but she made him an African-American by force of will and sinister intention. He never had any choice in the matter. He was raised to be a weapon by the same forces which molded Bill Ayers, Jeremiah Wright, Louis Ferrakhan ad Saul Alinski. Without his identity as a viper in the bosom of America, Obama would have no identity at all. He has lived his entire life not as a man but as a symbol. Only a symbol writes an autobiography before he has actually lived a life. Columbia and Harvard accepted a symbol into their student bodies. Harvard Law School selected a symbol to be editor of the Harvard Law Review, which is why they never expected him to publish an article and why he never published one. Michelle Obama, that unhappy Princetonian, married a symbol. The Reverend Wright adopted and groomed a symbol. William Ayers instructed and promoted a symbol. The Chicago political machine tolerated a symbol that greased its gears where gears need exactly the right kind of grease. And now the mass media have publicized, and endlessly protected, a symbol they'd prefer to a flesh-and-blood American president. And this where the disbelief comes in. The American people are about to elect a mere symbol as President of the United States. Think about this. Collectively, the American people know a lot. They know about media bias, as all the polls indicate. They know about the economic danger of handing the country over to a Democrat president and a Democrat congress, which is why they haven't done it once in the 30 years since the post-Watergate tantrum that put Jimmy Carter in the White House.They know that the world outside America is a nasty, treacherous place where reason and good intentions don't count for much, which is why they reelected George W. Bush in 2004 despite his many missteps and worldwide unpopularity. But these aren't the factors driving them now. Now, what has bubbled up from the depths is a desire for a reckoning. They want to lance the boil of race in America, and they're willing to pay any price to get it done. The American people know a lot, even if they underestimate the costs of their preferences. They know that there will be race riots if Obama loses -- and if Obama wins. They know he is not qualified to be president and that's okay with them because after Obama we won't have to go through this siege of political correctness and waiting and endless imputations of general racism again. They think they can pay the price of putting this damn racial issue behind them once and for all. Maybe they can. But I doubt it. Sometimes, lancing a boil simply spreads the infection. That's what will happen this time. The presidency of Barack Obama will be a fatal blow to race relations in the United States. Because for all the agreement that he's a symbol, precious few have bothered to ask what he's a symbol of. He's a symbol of race hatred. He's prepared to torpedo the Constitution, the capitalist system, U.S. foreign policvy, Israel, and the nation itself to wreak his vengeance on the white people who denied him an identity of his own. That's the scariest part. To Barack Obama, this election is about Barack Obama, not the United States of America. Sarah Palin had it right when she said at the Convention, "The presidency isn't about a voyage of personal discovery." Lance the boil? Goodbye freedom of speech. Goodbye secret ballots in union elections. Goodbye Supreme Court justices who read and treasure the actual Constitution. Goodbye babies. Goodbye Israel. Goodbye the U.S. military. Goodbye America. Original Sin. How much do you want to be punished? And why have you decided to forget the New Adam, the (real) One who taught us that the past really can be the past, unless you're an empty symbol of vengeance? Time is running out. Would you really trade your birthright for a mess of pottage? It begins to look like you would. I know it's considered polite to offer alternatives to catastrophe. I can think of only two. 1. Could each voter take a moment to
look at Obama the man, not the symbol?
2. Could somebody please fuck Michelle Obama to a screaming orgasm? Neither alternative seems very likely, but either one might save the day. Truthfully, Number Two is the more urgent priority. If we're going to pay eight years of penance, I'd feel better about it if the First Lady at least had a contented smile on her face. Such great matters of moment come down to such tiny details. That's why the look on my face right now can only be called... Disbelief. UPDATE. Even Mrs. IP is mad at me about this one. She says it's juvenile. She's right. To which I reply the entire election process has become juvenile. This is nothing compared to what has been done to Sarah Palin in these past two months. The MSM wanted to do an internal exam on the Republican Vice Presidiential candidate. So I'm not supposed to fight fire with fire. It's much much better to go down tamely to defeat in gentlemanly fashion. Lose the country? Sure. Lose our freedoms? Sure. Jettison the Constitution because the wife had an unfortunate experience at fucking Princeton? Sure. As long as we don't invade the modesty of a woman who hates all of us. Good. Fine. Great, in fact. I love it that the New York Times can do a hit piece on Cindy McKain, that the entire media can put Sarah Palin virtually in the sturrups and look inside her uterus with complete aplomb, and if I dare to suggest that it's a matter of national moment that Michelle Obama isn't getting laid enough, I'm some kind of a cad. Guess what. If it could save this nation from an Obama presidency, I'd show you Michelle's home videso with Barry and the gardener, her yeast test, and her napkin on the 28th day. If women want to be part of ruling the country, it's not enough that they're willing to show their breasts to Snoop Dogg on Spring Break. There are no secret parts of manhood when it comes to politics. If the nation's press can devote a million man-hours to lifting Sara Palin's skirt, I can devote 30 seconds to lifting Michelle Obama's. Because her nasty attitude looks to have more of a potential negative effect on the country than Sarah Palin's happy marriage and Down syndrome baby. So there. Mrs. IP is always free to comment, post, and otherwise provoke "he who crushes all opposition." She probably will. My position, though, is a simple one. Put yourself in the public eye as a campaigner, tell the American people you aren't proud of the land of your birth, and then suppress all speculation about why you look like a cold, hard, vicious bitch. Not going to happen. It's just that I'm the only one who has the guts to connect the dots. (uh, they're black, you know. Oooooh.) But it's not polite to make reference to anything that happens 'down there,' right? Well. Maybe. I'll buy that as soon as some woman explains to me how their pubic hair wound up on the chins of major league baseball players and other cartoon dudes. One or two times seems like carelessness. Seven hundred thousand times begins to seem like immodesty. Immodesty serves politicians when it does. Modesty serves politicians when it does. I'm still waiting to hear that modesty has anything at all to do with the female sex when it comes to politics. My opinion? They'd breastfeed the nation at Yankee Stadium if it would get them or their husbands elected. Okay, honey. Let fly.
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